Dear Baby Jesus,
Please forgive me for wasting 30 minutes of my existence while watching the last half of the new hit reality show "Identity" hosted by the everso charismatic Penn of the magical duo Penn and Teller while waiting on an hour-long rerun of "The Office" to air. I also would like to petition you for the strength to repent and break my addiction for writing ridiculous run-on sentences with unnecessary alliteration and feeling proud of myself for it. I know this is a pathetic waste of precious blog space and an uncouth slap in the face of those who wake up every morning and have to live with poor grammar skills.
Thank you for the chicken-flavored Ramen noodles that you have provided for me and a large pot where I can cook up a lovely double-batch for my dinner.
Thank you for my Casio keyboard on which I just so brilliantly picked out the theme song from "The Office." Thank you for using this to show me why I am still single.
Please give me sufficient rest and pleasant dreams tonight even if I stay up late and watch Family Guy and Aquateen Hungerforce on Cartoon Network so that tomorrow at work I won't try to spay a male cat.
Thank you reading my blog. Feel free to drop me a comment.
P.S.
Thank you for all the endorsements that made this blog possible.
4 comments:
Very nice, I too enjoy a good bag of chicken flavored ramen noodles. No one else (aside from my dutch wife) will eat them with me, but that's okay. I like having them all to myself. Sometimes I also get Cup O' Noodles (chicken flavor of course), throw all the dehydrated veggies away (they scare me) and heat that little buddy up in the microwave. I like that. I think I really just like the feeling I get when I eat noodles out of a cup. A styrofoam cup.
We watched the hour-long episode of The Office tonight too! It was great, we all (Kaleigh, myself, and Mumsy) enjoyed this. Afterward we watched Christmas Vacation and I made hot chocolate and whip cream. (Yes, I actually MADE the whip cream. You're impressed? You should be.)
If Baby Jesus forgives you for watching "Identity" then I certainly think he is going to forgive me for watching an episode of The Real World the other day. I could actually FEEL my I.Q. dropping with the passing of each minute. Bizarre.
Today I had a thirty minute conversation with a man about recent gynecological studies. I assume this is why I too, am residing in singularity. I can't imagine why.
Speaking of gynecology, if you manage to spay a male cat, consider me impressed.
I have ATHF, season one and two on DVD. I love me some ATHF, most definitely. It Makes me want to grow penicillin.
Amen.
Dr. Chris, nice job on the profile! You took my advice in announcing your heterosexuality, I am happy to see women excite you. Women excite me too. (In a strictly heterosexual way as well.) I especially like it when they cook pies, and other foodstuffs. I make great red beans and rice, it's exciting.
I hear you are in town now, the Rigaylorson (combination of rigdon/naylor/robertson) clan look forward to chillaxin' together! My mother and I might even party in B-ham for the coming of the New Year. Welches Sparkling Cider, here we come.
Bobbert told us you were all vomitty and the such. Congratulations, I'm sure that had to be a blast, much like the blast I had at thanksgiving with the scarlett fever/strep throat. Holidays and disease go together so well. Good times. Great Oldies. We were going to make s'mores tonight, but we refrained because we thought it would be cooler if you were in on that action too.
Maybe you should stop being sick, have you thought of that yet? I heard if you bend over, touch your toes, gyrate, and drink a Colt 45 all at once.. It'll cure you. Okay, so I can't back that up.
I find it creepy that my comments and I are the only ones on this particular page.. It's like I am totally invading a private space. (Insert awkward silence.)
I think I'll leave now.
CC - my brother invited you to our house. Did you get his message? i know life is busy, but he's had a lonely few weeks and is feeling the rejection from his b'ham friends...a call back any (or all) of them would make his day...
Sorry - just thinking of him as I read your superbly written blog...
Post a Comment